Login, log in, logon, who can make heads or tails of this jibberish?

Now you can relax and stop worrying about the definitions of computer terminology, as there is now an easy-to-use online reference for navigating these treacherous waters.

log in [lawg in] -verb.

1. inputting a username and/or password in order to gain access to a network or private online service. “Martha, can you log in to my facebook and see if Andrew replied to that message yet?”

login [lawg-in] -noun.

1. a user’s name and/or password for a network or private online service. Billy, what’s your login for Starcraft 2?

log on [lawg on] -verb.

1. inputting a username and/or password to gain access to a network; detached suffix on implies the user is attempting to ascend to a virtual plateau (network) rather than breaking down electronic barriers to get in to their online service (e-mail).  When I log on to the network at work it makes this dumb noise that sounds like hippos mating.

Logon [lawg-on] -noun.

1. a rare and dated version of login, often reserved for aging dinosystems at the local hardware store. Mike, after I send a piece of electronic mail and browse the world wide web, I will logon to Microsoft Networking Messenger and we can have an online chat session.